My lesbian sister has decided to have a baby. She's researching sperm banks and called to ask if I'd fill out some forms for her, as the institutions require a physician to sign off before giving women semen samples. The forms essentially say that the woman understands the risks and benefits of sperm, specifically that she is aware the product can cause her to become pregnant.
As we talked about the odd set of litigation concerns they must have, I suggested that if she needed more than three or four samples she make a complaint call.
'I have two complaints,' she'd tell them. 'The first is that I've been using your product for several months now and I'm still not pregnant. The second is that it tastes terrible.'
4 comments:
Hysterical!
I was going to make a joke about 'where can I make a donation' but I thought that would be in bad taste..." Glad I didn't say anything like that...
Send me your stats, Johnny
I would be very interested in hearing the details about the transational arrangement of buying sperm. Is it taxed? Do you get a receipt? If so, what does the receipt say? How much is it? Do you have to look at it before they insert it? I'm assuming they insert it for you?
Don't forget you can always buy Vincent Gallo's sperm:
http://www.vgmerchandise.com/store/pages.php?pageid=4
Yeah, does it come with instructions? Or a list of nutritional facts? Does it have an expiration date or best if used by date?
Post a Comment